My Heart Asks The Silliest Questions

Will she ever turn back to me?

This is the question that is tattooed on my mind. I just keep on thinking of the answers to this one day and night. You got it right. Day and night. Well, yeah, this isn’t a very difficult question. There will be only two answers, no matter what. Just a simple yes, or a simple no. I know it’s the stupidest question you’ve ever heard of. But when your heart is jaded and wounded, you don’t get to realize all that. All you know is that you’re hurt, exhausted, enervated, and you don’t wanna think about anything else. You’ve given her all you’ve got, but she thinks you’re not good enough. You think she’s the right one for you, and you can never find another girl. You think you’ve just had enough, and you evaluate yourself. You ask yourself questions. The stupidest and mushiest questions. You come to think if she’ll ever turn back to you. That’s what I’ve been asking myself since time immemorial. That’s what I’m asking myself now. And another thing that keeps on bugging me is if it’s gonna be yes, why? And if it’s gonna be a big NO, why not?

She will turn back to me.

Okay, let’s say she will turn back to me. Why? I don’t know. She has her reasons. I think she just realized that I’m a big loss of hers. That she won’t be happy with another guy. That she finally found love in me. That’s it! I got it! Oh, and don’t think that I’m so vain and arrogant. These are just presumptions, you know. I guess one of these will be one of her reasons for turning back to me. And what if…

She will never turn back to me?

Oh, this is gonna be a big disaster. Talk about losing her my entire godforsaken life! I guess I would just have to admit it if that would be that case. Why won’t she ever turn back to me? You don’t know? I don’t know either. But she definitely does. Lemme guess. Hmmm, she thinks it’s not gonna work out? Nah, stupid answer. Her friends don’t like me for her? How stupid can you get? You’ve got the same set of friends for god’s sake! Err, she has a boyfriend? Good shot. She’s had enough of me? That’s another one. I’m not her type of a guy? Maybe. She loves the bad-boy type. I’m just not the type of a guy she likes.

Well, I guess all the questioning will lead me nowhere. I won’t know the answers if I just keep on asking myself. This is nonsense. I won’t even try picking petals one by one while chanting “She’ll turn back to me, She’ll turn back to me not.” I still have my wits together, thank you very much.

It’s just a matter of time before the answers are revealed.

As for me, I’ll be waiting for that very moment.