Big Summer Getaway

It’s the start of the summer break! I’m leaving for Dubai on the 7th and I can’t wait. I’m spending the whole summer vacation there. It’s kind of sad to think that I’m leaving my friends again and I’m more than probably gonna miss loads of summer trips but I guess going to that place is just as fun. We’re going to the beach, explore most of this truly wonderful city (which I kind of didn’t get to do during my last two visits there), and then perhaps a bigger area of the country. Oh, I almost forgot, I’m gonna go bowling too! And for free!

I’m brewing up more plans for the summer tour. I’m gonna go shopping lots of stuff like clothes and shoes and clothes (did I mention clothes already?), and souvenir items too. I’m getting some only-coming-from-Dubai stuff for my friends, and friends of my friends, and friends of friends of my friends (what, the 3 degrees friendship thing popularized by FRIENDSTER?)

Ack, I can’t wait. I wanna pack my things up already.

But before that, my friends and I, (actually, it’s just really me) are planning for a big summer getaway. I wanna go to Laguna for the swimming part and then Baguio for the outing part of it. But as usual, my so joy-killer friends are so not into that and we ended up planning for a small swimming trip to Antipolo. It’s irritating to think that Antipolo is so just next city but I’m gonna have to bear with them because I can’t go on my big summer getaway without them. That would be just so boring. And they’re still having trouble looking for some kind of transportation because I could only have just one of them in my car since it’s a two-seater thing. I can’t even bring their stuff because I have to bring mine. I mean where would I put my things if they’re gonna put theirs in my trunk?

Ack, I can’t wait. I wanna pack my things up already.

My Big Day

Whoa. It's been a long day. I woke up at 7 in the evening and that was just when my day started. I had dinner, and then went online the whole night. Something went really wrong on my computer so I had to do a complete system makeover. Thank god I keep the backup disks in my CD case or else I'm so doomed. After doing the reformatting, I watched Agent Cody Banks to kill time. It was a total killer. Then after that, I got dressed up and ready for the big day.

Oh well, it wasn't really that big. I had big plans for it, though. I had my theoretical proposal paper printed at the shopping center at a little past 9. It was just funny that I wanted to have my paper printed black, yet the machine came up with color copies of it. So, I had to shed a few more bucks for those unexpected full-color prints of my paper and for that oh-so-cool file folder which came with a slide. I think it's called StarFile or something. Then, I went to the college and looked for my instructor to submit my project but oh, he wasn't there yet. So I just left it at the department. There's really no guarantee that my submission would reach its destination, but I'm taking my chances. I've sent a soft copy of it to my professor through e-mail, anyway.

Okay. So after that hectic schoolwork I went to meet up with Apple at the AS parking lot. Whoa. We both have a car of sorts yet we were planning on just taking a cab to Ever Commonwealth because we sort of didn't know how to get there. After putting some more thinking into the deal, we just decided to take her car. We didn't wanna take a cab to the mall and carry her bowling bag (which is what, 50 pounds) around, looking for the bowling center. Ack, she's just taking her advanced PE exam and see how much of a problem it created. Screw PE.

I was planning on taking a book out of the lib and reading it at Starbucks somewhere. I really would have to study for my two logic exams which I don't even know when I'll be taking. It turned out that I didn't have enough energy and enthusiasm and all that to go all the way to Libis to have some coffee and get a nice study place. I just decided to go home, grab some lunch, and perhaps start studying there with all the possible distractions.

Oh, before I forget, I took my Nat Sci II final this afternoon. It was so unexpected. I just went to the Biology Pavilion to check out if I was gonna have to take the final, which, I was just so sure I was. Then there was this security guard there who kept asking all kinds of stuff. She even asked me what I was doing there. Ring ring. Ring ring. Hello? I was just checking my stuff. Go check yours. She also asked me who my instructor was. I was like, "Uh, I forgot his name." In fact, I don't know his name at all because for the entire term, I only attended three meetings of that class. But later on, she became kind of more cooperative when I said I was gonna see the list of those people who were required to take the final and the schedule too. I found out the final was scheduled on the 23rd. But it was already the 24th!

I ended taking the exam with two other classmates who also missed the schedule. I don't know if I did well enough to pass it. But there are more important things to do, like finally realizing it's already the summer break and I'm supposed to have fun.

[In]Sane Reflections

Sanity. (n) \’sa-n&-tE\ (ME sanite, from Latin sanitat-, sanitas health, sanity, from sanus healthy, sane): the quality of being sane; especially: soundness or health of mind

I just watched Session 9. It’s kind of like, a horror/suspense flick that hit the theatres in 2001, I think. I borrowed a DVD copy of it from a friend almost a month ago and it was just tonight that I actually got to see it. And I regret having been so stubbornly unaware that tempus fugit since god knows when. I’m not doing a review of the movie, just in a very likely case that you’re thinking about that right now. There’s just something that hit me hard the moment I realized the conclusion of the story, which I have always pondered on every once in a while, and then just settle myself with not meddling with this kind of stuff. That’s another painful regret I’m making for the day.

What is sanity? As I have posted right there at the top, it’s simply the state of being sane, having a sound mind. This may work for people who don’t think like I do. Apparently, the definition of the concept is very problematic. And, as far as I have comprehended since hours ago, the concept per se is problematic. See, how is someone to know who’s sane and who’s not? Are there any set rules or standards of sanity? Do they think you don’t have a sound mind if you see things in a different way? How about different ways? Do people think you’re crazy when you don’t think the way they do? Yes, they may. They may not. As it’s always been in history, the most intelligent people were never thought intelligent during their time.

There is a fine line between sanity and insanity. But has this line ever been set? To what extent can you play at to still be within the bounds of sanity? I think there is a line between these two sticky concepts, but it has been and still is a blurred one. If we consider some people insane, then what do they think of us? Is it that in their perception of the world, they are the sane ones and we’re on the other side? We can never tell. Even if we would honestly ask them these questions, we could never be sure they would honestly answer us. Because there’s this great possibility that they wouldn’t take us seriously for the same reason as we wouldn’t them. There could be a myriad of ways how these people whom we consider crazy see the world.

Thinking about this just makes me shrug.

And when I shrug, I don’t wanna think about anything anymore.

Update on Political Agenda

Whew. I played 15 games today just to get qualified to play in the Graded finals tomorrow. That’s a lot of games. I’m actually feeling more exhausted than ever. A marathon, I might say. I couldn’t get a high series to qualify for the Associate finals which is supposed to be a level under Graded. Ack, there are lots of good players trying to squeeze themselves into the final twelve. I don’t know what’s gotten into them. I’m supposed to be playing in that division but what the heck, I couldn’t get in so I ought to do something. Far-fetched as this decision may seem, I’m trying my luck.

The politics of the real world apply to just any field, to any discipline. Sports are not an exception. “Harang” people try to play in a group they’re too advanced to fit in to, in the hope of getting to win the tournament way more easily than if they were to play in their own level. Their PBC average cries out loud, “You’re supposed to be Graded already, you son of a bitch!” And since they’re sons and daughters of fucking bitches, they just wouldn’t listen. That’s a very visible circumstance that money matters most to these people.

May god purge this world of people who are so not deserving to live a life here.

I must be feeling high and my thoughts are getting uncontrollably crappy.

I’m off to bed.

National Address

I need your help, people! I'm playing in the Graded division of the PSB Open Championships and I need your prayers bad.

Your prayers mean a lot to me.

Okay, so this is just another post which contains no interesting or disturbing thoughts.

Start of Days

Whoo! The last day of regular classes. I must admit I have accomplished not-so-easy academic missions this past week. I was able to write a 15-minute drama production script, prepare the sound effects, gather crew and the talents, that kind of stuff. I did it in two days. The hardest part was the crew and talents gathering because everyone was getting more stubborn than ever that they wouldn’t agree to join the group, just to make things difficult for me. Ah, to all you people I requested to help and declined for some selfish reason, bless you.

Whoo! My schedule was super hectic. I barely have enough time for my self, my pre-bedtime grooming ceremonials, and my vocal exercises. Ack, I’m just so glad I’m done with almost everything. I took my Portuguese final this morning and I swear, I did find it super easy that I’m sure I’m gonna pass it in a heartbeat. I did my drama production this afternoon and I would be blissful to give it an okay rating. It was forty seconds overtime because my spinners got screwed. They didn’t know what track to play and then the mike of the narrator had a technical error. Anyways, my instructor didn’t mention anything about a failing grade or something.

Argh, two more logic exams for next week. Oops, and one more Nat Sci II final. This means more coffee, more nicotine, more sleepless nights, and more profit for Starbucks.

I’m still playing in the PSB Open Championships at the Green Valley Country Club this weekend.

Screw those fucking exams. I’m gonna have fun.

Lost in the Politics of the Real World

I’m bitter. Yeah, I’m cold. I’m not anywhere near being happy. Who wouldn’t be bitter if you had all the stupidest and weirdest and I-don’t-know-how-I-would-describe-them-anymore things happening to you? There must be some curse that’s been cast upon me some time in the past. I don’t know. I don’t frigging know. I didn’t do anything unethical or bad or evil to anyone. I don’t deserve this kind of treatment. Ask anyone. I could be really tough sometimes, but please, save my weakest point. If I’m generally nice to you aside from my super nasty and uneven mood swings, be nice to me, okay? Why the friggin’ hell would I treat you that way if you’re doing otherwise?

Holy shit. Purvis thought I’m ready to be promoted to the national youth pool. Take note, it’s Purvis. Fucking Purvis! And how dare you not listen to his suggestions? You’re such a crappy coach. I haven’t learned a damned thing from you since I started training. And you dare take a professional’s opinion for granted? How thick could you get? God, don’t tell me the world’s coming to an end now.

Ah, I’m starting to feel the power of politics. And I can’t take it any longer. I’m better than most of those dim-witted youth players you’re bragging about. Duh, I can beat them any time for crying out loud! Oh, and you’re not an exception. I can beat you any time I wish. You’ve really got to have the balls to do such a heinous thing. I hate you, you fucking asshole.

Wokie. Ranting’s over, guys.

Other than that situation, I think I’m getting better at comprehending things that happen in the real world. The real world is totally like school. There are some people you have to connect yourself to just to have an edge. There are some things you can’t do while they’re watching. There are some thoughts you want to be heard which will never come out of your mouth. It sucks. And yeah, after this, I’m sure there still is an awful lot of cool stuff waiting for me. I see them coming. This cool-stuff-chain is never gonna break.

I hope.

Untitled College Log

You've got to be really advanced, man! - Purvis Granger to me.

1.25 for my speech.

P 8,000 from winning the Thursday league.

Good things come. Everything else don't.

And I'm okay with that.

*This is just a summary of a truncated post. Damn Internet Explorer 6.0. More on these things later.

Join the Club

It’s just so annoying to have BIBBO classmates. They raise their hands all the time to interrupt the discussion and draw the class’ attention to them. They have this craze to show everyone that they’re smart, brilliant, and excellent. And they have this credo to get a high grade by always blurting out rude comments during a presentation of one our classmates, to impress our instructor. It’s funny how they always fail and get a big “duh” from us. Screw them. Screw the dynamic BIBBO duo.

They’re not smart. They’re not brilliant. Neither are they excellent. They’re nothing worth writing about. But hey, the experience with them, the “duhs”, the “shut up, loser”, and the “who cares?” that we throw back at them every time they are in their psychiatric disorder is always fun to write about for the whole world to know. There was actually this one time when one of the duo was presenting his theoretical framework and no one was listening (except the professor) to him. We didn’t even bother to listen to him and comment on his presentation. He already sucked without our participation. And the professor didn’t like his presentation because it was unstructured, irrelevant, and just plain non-sense. We hoped he got a 5.0 for that. Ah, I’m so cruel. But those BIBBO kids need cruel people to straighten them up.

So, if you’re experiencing the same uninteresting things with BIBBO kids like we are, join the club! Inform us immediately so we could give you the application form and you could start with the application process as soon as possible. Join screw-BIBBO-kids club!

School Sucks

It’s 5 in the morning. I’m supposed to be sleeping right now. But I got really hungry and I was forced to wake up and tuck something into my pie hole. Ack, I remember, I didn’t eat last night! I was just so tired last night that I went to bed the moment I got home. I even forgot to change my clothes. I was still wearing my cargo pants when I woke up, but I didn’t seem to mind the fact that they’re not really comfortable to sleep with because I really needed to catch some forty winks. I was up all Thursday night doing my persuasive speech plan and my J101 paper. It’s so much fun to realize that I’ve got nothing to do this weekend but hibernate.

Holy crap, I can’t close my eyes. I’m still worried about what my instructor told me yesterday. He’s kicking me out his class because of too many absences. He recorded, I think, 9 absences but duh, 3 of them are excused because I was ill. So technically, that’s only 6. And he’s not supposed to force me to drop. Even so, I can’t drop it anymore because the deadline’s way over. So I’m just gonna have to hold tight onto my seat. I’m not quitting. I’ve already done my investigative report and that’s the most difficult kind of thing to work on since the preparation for my high school prom.

My speech class yesterday wasn’t any better. I was a sleepyhead in three of my classes but the thought of doing an impromptu speech kept me alive and kicking. Okay, my speech topic was saving the environment and I must admit – I did suck. I didn’t know what the hell I was doing. What do I know about saving the environment anyway? I definitely could have done better if the topic was lighter. And duh, I was given only 2 minutes to prepare. So I know everyone was expecting me to just babble shit in front of them. Damn.

I am so busted.

Lizzie = Hilary

I just saw Lizzie McGuire! The movie, of course, silly. Sheesh, I just realized it took me over a year to see that movie. I think it’s cool. I don’t really get to see much of her on the telly since my stupid CATV provider removed Disney Channel from the channel list but what the heck, I really like her. I have the movie on DVD. Yup, I know Edu Manzano and the rest of the video regulatory whatever people would kill me if they knew it was pirated. Duh, a digital home video for just a little over a dollar? That’s real bargain – a bargain to die for.

Okay, the movie starred Hilary Duff and some other people from the TV show whose names I don’t remember. Anyways, the story was just about their entire class going to Rome for some historical education stuff, Lizzie meeting Paolo Vi --- Vil --- uh, forget it --- at a fountain, Lizzie looking exactly like Isabella (Paolo’s singing partner), Lizzie and Paolo kind of dating, Paolo setting up Lizzie (whom the fans think is the real Isabella) to ruin Isabella’s career, Lizzie getting hurt, Lizzie, Isabella, and Gordo getting back to Paolo, and Lizzie kissing Gordo. You should see the movie, especially the ending. It’s just so sweet and romantic. I really liked that. Jeez, I’m being a hopeless romantic again. Oh well, liking teeny romantic stuff is just so me.

But before anyone even tries to post a comment that I suck at writing reviews, I would like all of you to know that I’m not making a review of the movie. I’m just sharing my thoughts, I think. And if you people think this really is a review, think again. You could never expect a review that contains the phrase “I really liked that” from me.

I actually wanted to quote a dialogue from the movie for the conclusion of this post but my favorite scene is just so visual that the actors’ lines wouldn’t make sense to readers who haven’t seen the film. Honestly, even to me, the dialogue after Gordo and Lizzie’s super romantic kiss doesn’t make sense. And yet, I like the movie. That’s what I would like to call “suspension of criticism”.

“Hey now, hey now, this is what dreams are made of.”

I love that song.

Read Me

You (yes, you),

Okay, so you’re pissed because I posted something on your tag board which I think could make you better at writing? So what? It’s not like I didn’t care about how you would feel about it. It’s more like I was just concerned with your blog content. Consider it as a tip. Tips do help. No, I don’t think highly of myself for giving you such but please, listen first. There’s more to life in this world than just emotions, feelings. With softness of heart often comes softness of mind. Don’t think about what other people would think of you once they read my tag. Think about what I’m telling you and how it would be of some sort of help to you. There’s nothing better in this world than sharing knowledge. That is, of course, in an intellectual perspective.

I’m glad that, although you did seem bitter in your last post, you appreciated it. I only wanted to help, really. If the subliminal I’m-good-at-blogging-you’re-not message keeps getting right through you, then I’m sorry. It wasn’t my intention to sound like I was a super cool blogger, not at all. There are just some things meant to be said in some ways.

About me preferring the tag board to e-mail, it’s pretty obvious. Posting directly on your tag board is way easier than opening my mail client. So humiliating you is not actually one of my options.

I’m sorry for screwing your lovely day.

Me.

Hiatus?

I didn't know I really was on a writing hiatus until a good (sweet, actually) friend of mine told me I seemed I was. It was unnoticed and therefore, unintentional. Of course, I know no one would expect me to stop writing for a short while just like that. I mean, I would have left a note on my blog that I don't feel like writing at this point for some rare (very rare) reason. For that, I apologize to all my fans out there who keep waiting for the next article to get posted. I just wish I had fans out there.

Ack, I'm getting more and more non-academic by the day. I don't feel like going to school and meeting my classmates. I don't wanna take exams or listen to lectures. I don't wanna make any theoretical framework blah-blah presentations and suck at it because I'm not prepared. My mind's lagged. So is my body. I'm not sure I have a soul but, yeah, I think it's lagged too. I wanna take a break. The only class I look forward to attending is my Radio class. On second thought, it's an 8:30 am class, so I'd rather sleep.

On with what's eating me right now...

I've been bowling and bowling at different places just lately. I've been coming to training at the Philippine Sports Commission (which, unfortunately, is located way too far from my house), and leagues at Pearl and Sta. Lucia. I'm kind of considering bowling full-time this coming term. I think it would really help my academics, career, and myself if I would go on leave for a semester. That way, I could concentrate more on practice and training, rest more, and think of nothing else other than my job. And by the time I get back to school, I could focus more on my studies and less on my sport. I'm also thinking of taking this part-time feature writer job offer at the Manila Bulletin. It's kind of a more stable source of income anyway. But after thinking it over, I guess that would just complicate things a bit more.

So much to do in so little time.

So much to think about amid so many tasks.

I'm telling you, I'm sooo fucking screwed.

Furious Ranting

I wanna rant.

Just for a moment.

I feel sooooo useless.
Damn it.
I haven't been coming to class regularly for months now and I've become a lousier player than ever.
I wasted money.
I wasted time.
I'm wasted.

So help me God.